Sex just gets better

A Good Woman's Dirty Mind    is a great blog (if you haven't checked it out already get over there and do so - after you've finished reading mine, of course) and she wrote a piece recently on the differing sex lives of Liberals versus  Democrats.

Turns out the Conservatives sex lives dry up at about age 68 (eek!) whereas Liberals continue an active sex life into their 80's ( I knew there was a good reason I was a Liberal!!)

I also r4ead recently that dear old Miley ( yes the twerk mad pop star) thinks that if you are over 40 ( 40!! people, come on what drugs is she on???) then you are no longer having sex. EVER. AT. ALL.


Well I would just like to state for the record that sex only gets better with age. Much like a fine wine or a good cheese.

If you have been reading any of my blog posts ( and if you haven't then check out some of my other ones as soon as you finish this one. Trust me it will be worth it.) I am now 51 while my darling hubby is 61. So in the world according to Miley we have been sexually inactive for the past 11 years for me  and since the Hubster and I didn't get together until he was forty our sex life would have never got off the ground.

I know! Shocking so lets all take a nice deep, cleansing breath and relax because I am here to tell you that sex only gets better (well for us Liberals, anyway).

That's right sex gets better...... and better..... and better ( oh my God it is soooo GOOD!)

We have had our house full of kids for years. In fact we have only been empty nesters ( hideous phrase, someone come up with something cool and sexy STAT) for the past two years. Yup,two years! and there is nothing like a house all to yourself to completely unleash all of your sexy, sexiness to its full potential, like having the house completely devoid of children, or anyone else for that matter.

All you parents out there will know what I'm talking about. No having to worry if the kids are asleep or wondering if they are going to tromp down the hall going  "Muuuuuummmmmm"at just the wrong moment (and trust me, they do)

Earlier this year my youngest moved home for month before flying off to America this led to one embarrassing moment which can happen after months of the house all to yourself.

Me in all my sexy glory.

The intimacy and depth of trust in a relationship grows over the years and this allows you both to stretch more fully into your sexual selves. There is comfort in knowing that your partner still finds you desirable even though your body is not the same as it was when you got together.

Sure, we still have some less than ecstatic experiences as any long time married, working couple will tell you, sometimes you are both just tired or sex is the last thing on your mind or well, whatever, life sometimes just gets in the way. But, thankfully, we also have some mind blowing, leg - trembling, mind blowing ecstatic experiences and , blissfully, these are more and more common and well worth waiting for.

Part of this, for us, was a conscious decision to focus on improving our sex lives. Yes, it does need some though and action on your part, it doesn't just happen. No magic fairy is coming along to anoint you with new sexual powers ( sad but true). Reading Nicole Daedone's book Slow Sex ( if  you haven't read it, go get a copy) and putting it into practise was a step in the right direction. I also made the decision that I was a Sex Goddess, several years previously and that added another dimension to our sex lives, fully embracing my sexuality has been HUGE, huge I tell you.
So if your sex life has gotten a little lack luster remember that (a) there is hope (b) it is up to you to change it, not your partner, YOU .

What about you? Have you noticed that your sex life is getting better as you get older? Leave me a comment below.

Dear Vagina,

You seem to get a bad rap so I thought I would spend some time just hanging out with you today. Everybody seems to have an opinion about exactly how you should look which seems a tad unfair.  I think because you are tucked away and hidden most of the time that how you look is really a matter for you and your owner and everyone else should mind their own damned business but noooooo, they comment on the amount of hair that is there ( or not), what constitutes a reasonable covering for you ( g-string, bikini briefs, "granny pants")  and even how you should smell.

Personally I think you are AWESOME in whatever form you take. I guess our poor friend penis cops his fair share of flak too. Although that mostly seems to be an issue  of size which is crazy because, you, dear vagina, are truly very accommodating. If only the penis users had a shred of a clue of all the wondrous things that they could be doing with their penis ( and , lets face it, the rest of their bodily parts) to make up for any perceived deficiencies of their appendage, we would all be a lot happier and talk of being "too small"would disappear!

I did my best to save you from the bumblings of teenage boys in our youth. I truly did. I felt that we both deserved to lose our virginity to a more experienced man. Sadly, it turns out that age is not a decent indicator of experience!
Thankfully I developed better taste in men as we got older and you and I have become better friends.
I want to apologise for all the times I cursed you when really it was the uterus who was to blame and those pesky hormones. I don't want to dwell on that too much as thankfully, those days are behind us now
I also want to apologise for that one time that I shaved you.
Can we please just put it behind us? I think we were both deeply traumatised by it.
 As for the stories friends tell me about getting theirs waxed? Makes me shudder ( and yes, I can feel you wincing from here) just thinking about it. Some swear by it and tell me how sexy it makes them feel and if it works for them that's great!

All you ever wanted to know about your vajayjay

My friend, Sharon, has written a great book called "The Vagina Buffet" about her time as a Brazilian waxer and as the owner of a vagina. Its great read and parts of it truly did make me giggle.
 I have also had it explained to me that being hair free makes for better oral sex which I'm sure is true but I can't help thinking about well, you know, stubble and regrowth.  And I am sure that with the proliferation of tongue piercings there is less trouble with those  pesky hairs getting tangled but, oh my, I guess I just like things less complicated.

I guess it also helps that you, dear vagina, are fairly sparsely haired to begin with and from the bottom of my heart I am grateful for that.

I would also like to thank you for delivering to me my three beautiful sons. You did a stand up job even though they were all blessed with incredibly large heads. You bounced back really well. I guess all those kegel exercises paid off over the years and now that I have my Kegelmaster  its like you are brand new again

Now that Hubby and I are taking time to practise Orgasmic Meditation  I have developed an even deeper love for you ( oh and hubby too!) . So thank you dear vagina, for being such an awesome part of my body and my life.